UNinviting UNinvited Guests!

On August 25, 2010

It’s my goal to rid the world of guests who decide to invite whomever they like to other people’s weddings!  Why people feel comfortable deciding to increase your head count, and therefore your budget, without your consent is beyond me.  However, I would like to help you rid yourself of those uninvited guests!

In a perfect world, engaged couples would be able to invite every single person that they’ve ever met to their weddings.  Unfortunately, the majority of brides and grooms simply cannot afford to do so.  I know from experience that couples often find the addressing of invitations to be totally over the top, but it’s all done for a reason.  It’s very, very important to place the names of exactly who is invited on the outer envelope that houses your wedding invitation.  If you are inviting John and Jane Doe, the outer envelope should say Mr. and Mrs. John Doe (or some version of their names).  Please do not address your invitations to John Doe and Family“And Family” to some people means kids, cousins, their mothers and the family dog!  If you are inviting their children, place their children’s names on the inner envelope.  If you’re not planning to use an inner envelope, change your mind.  It will save you money and the headache of having to uninvite people.

When (yes when – there’s always one) you do receive RSVPs listing additional guests, you’re going to feel like you have allow those people to come.  Don’t!  You are no more obligated to host uninvited guests at your wedding than you are to host me at your wedding.  I believe that one of the kindest ways to handle the situation without totally upsetting the actual person(s) you invited goes a little something like this:

Hi John/Jane Doe, we just received your RSVP for the wedding!  We are so excited that you are going to be there to celebrate with us.  I noticed that you RSVPd for John Q. Public.  We love John Q. Public and it would be so awesome to have him there.  Unfortunately, the site only fits a certain number of people and we are already at capacity.  We are really sorry we couldn’t invite everyone, but we are so happy that you are going to be there!

Trust me, letting one or two uninvited guests slide will quickly turn into 10 or 11 uninvited guests which will turn into $2000.00 plus extra dollars that you might or might not have or might or might not want to spend on people who you did not think to invite in the first place.  That extra money could be spent on your honeymoon or a down payment for your home.

If you try this approach, let me know how it goes:)

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